边看边记

▓▓▓▓1. why people can be uncomfortable with talking:
●There's the fear of saying the wrong thing, or saying the right thing in the wrong way.

▓▓▓▓2. The basics of successful conversation:
●Honesty, ●The Right Attitude, ●Interest in the Other Person, ●Openness About Yourself
（1）就算天生的演讲能手也有后天雕琢的痕迹。什么都是可以练出来的。
（2）不要使自己时刻成为对话的主导方。可以适当用自己的喜好或故事引起话题，但不能过多，易引起反感。
（3）坦诚自己的情况。当自己在对话中不自信或状态不佳时，可以将自己的情况告诉对方或听众，让他人理解你的状态，这种坦诚可以减少你对交谈的畏惧。

▓▓▓▓3. Breaking the Ice: How to Talk to Strangers
●Overcoming shyness----yours and theirs
The person you are talking to puts his pants on one leg at a time.
Talk to people about themselves and they will listen for hours!
●Getting started
Weather, floods, earthquakes, their family, the occasion……
●Questions to avoid： yes/no questions
●The first rule of conversation: LISTEN
We never learn a thing while we are talking.
Careful listening makes you better able to respond.
To be interesting, to be interested.
●Body language
Be comfortable.
Make eye contact.
Worry about how well you are talking and let your body language take care of itself.
●Is anything taboo anymore?
You have to consider how intimately you know the people you are talking with to decide whether you can break those taboos.

▓▓▓▓4.Social Talk: Cocktail parties, Dinners,Weddings
●Ask questions is the secret of good communication.
●You'll be remembered as a better conversationalist if you ask the opinions of others around you.
●Don't monopolize the conversation.

▓▓▓▓5. Eight Things the Best Talkers Have in Common
●They look at things from a new angle, taking unexpected points of view on familiar subjects.
●They have broad horizons. They think about, and talk about, a wide range of issues and experiences beyond their own daily lives.
●They are enthusiastic, displaying a passion for what they're doing with their lives and an interest in what you're saying to them at the moment.
●They don't talk about themselves all the time.
●They are curious.They ask "why?"
●They empathize.They try to put themselves in your place, to relate to what you're saying.
●They have a sense of humor. And they don't mind using it on themselves. In fact, the best conversationalists frequently tell stories on themselves.
●They have their own style of talking.

▓▓▓▓6. Trendy Talk and Political Correctness
●Sometimes using one of these catchphrases will help you make a connection with someone you're talking to, but doing it often makes you sound unoriginal, as though you can't think up your own expression.


▓▓▓▓7.Business Talk
●Ways to break bad speech habits: listen to yourself, think ahead to what you're going to say.
●●Job Interviews:
●Show prospective employers what you can do for them.●Maintain an open attitude.●Be prepared.●Ask questions.
●●Meetings.
As a participant:●The less said, the better. ●Don't put others down. ●Be willing to ask dumb questions. ●Don't waste others' time.
Running a meeting:●Preparation. ●Start on time. ●Be decisive. ●Be firm.

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